New Day...
Hey ya'll. It is a new day and I am loving it. The sky is a bit foggy, just like my brain (lol). The temp is cool, and frankly I can see the sun beginning to peek out, like it is feeling free to share itself again today.
This dating thing is kinda fun and a bit challenging. Got me questioning myself and picking the negative about myself and this dude. Truth is, I do not know him. Truth is, there is no reason for me to want him in my life. Umm, I do not know him.
Sometimes when you are searching, being available for love, you go a little berserk. Obviously I have dipped into the nitwit pool. Thank God common sense rained down on me this morning.
However, it is tiring this dating thing. So many people, male and female are playing games. Guys come with hang ups, and we do too. I have experienced so many guys behaving badly that I stopped giving them a clean slate. Unbeknowest to me, I start putting guys all in the same category. My bad. I do not want it done to me, and in addition to that, I will miss out on my blessing, meeting a great guy who may not be a life partner, but at the least a good friend. Why should I do that to myself. I won't. I choose to love me and to be available for a loving, caring, good - right for me male life time partner. Dating will get me to that person, so I will date.
My philosophy is if not for me, maybe for someone I know. If I have not shared any intimacies beyond that of friendship with the guy, why should I care? I know it may be harder than it sounds, but heck, I want my friend/ associate to be happy too. I want to be happy as well, so I do not block blessings. Besides that means blocking my own. Umm, that ain't gone be ok shawt.
Sometimes I get really caught up in me, my life, my wants. I become very selfish. I have to take myself off of the throne and place God there. When I let Him have His rightful place my life moves easier, and I do not act like a mad woman. I have done this with guys in the past. Why should I make him that important to me anyway? What if he ain't for me? Wasting time becoming emotional about someone that I should just smile at wish them well as they move on to meet the love of their life. They taught/ teach me a lesson, sometimes about life, sometimes about men, most times about me and my long list of issues (lol)!! It is all good, cause trust, I will love the Queen. I will be victorious in following God, loving me, loving you, and getting rid of fools and living successfully and fully as a grown and blessed woman. K?
On occassion that demon desperation raises her ugly little head. That demon fear is her mother, really. When I took the issue to the Father, he stamped it out. Told me the monster was dead, and to keep dancing to the tune that He placed in my head. He does have the man for me, and I need to continue to take care of me and my life, He has the love part on lock.
So I walk in the fog, dance in it, cry in it knowing that I am being guided through it, and that there will be times of beautiful sunshine. Keep smiling anyway. Favor is my best friends and falls fresh on me like morning dew, every day. Ya' better know it. I will continue to take care of my home, my finances, my education, my health, my life (social and otherwise), my spirit and soul. I will continue to be comfortable being me in my skin and I will remember that I am here to love and be loved and that I am enough where I am. If that is not enough for the men that I meet until I meet the man that I am meant for, let them dance and float on. I am enough. Not too much, not to little, enough. I am a work in progress. If you can't get with that, you can move forward too.
My goal in relationships is not to change or improve a soul. Nor do I need that from anyone I have a relationship with me. I can encourage you to grow, to look at life differently, to relax, and heck yeah to laugh. Encourage me to do the same, esp. the laughing part. Laughter is great for the soul anyway ;o)
It is a new day today. Glad to see it and be a part of it. Thank God I am off of that throne and out of the nitwit pool. Common sense reigns again.
PS - Do not get it twisted. I am still the Queen, but even Royalty must answer to a Higher power.
Kita
This dating thing is kinda fun and a bit challenging. Got me questioning myself and picking the negative about myself and this dude. Truth is, I do not know him. Truth is, there is no reason for me to want him in my life. Umm, I do not know him.
Sometimes when you are searching, being available for love, you go a little berserk. Obviously I have dipped into the nitwit pool. Thank God common sense rained down on me this morning.
However, it is tiring this dating thing. So many people, male and female are playing games. Guys come with hang ups, and we do too. I have experienced so many guys behaving badly that I stopped giving them a clean slate. Unbeknowest to me, I start putting guys all in the same category. My bad. I do not want it done to me, and in addition to that, I will miss out on my blessing, meeting a great guy who may not be a life partner, but at the least a good friend. Why should I do that to myself. I won't. I choose to love me and to be available for a loving, caring, good - right for me male life time partner. Dating will get me to that person, so I will date.
My philosophy is if not for me, maybe for someone I know. If I have not shared any intimacies beyond that of friendship with the guy, why should I care? I know it may be harder than it sounds, but heck, I want my friend/ associate to be happy too. I want to be happy as well, so I do not block blessings. Besides that means blocking my own. Umm, that ain't gone be ok shawt.
Sometimes I get really caught up in me, my life, my wants. I become very selfish. I have to take myself off of the throne and place God there. When I let Him have His rightful place my life moves easier, and I do not act like a mad woman. I have done this with guys in the past. Why should I make him that important to me anyway? What if he ain't for me? Wasting time becoming emotional about someone that I should just smile at wish them well as they move on to meet the love of their life. They taught/ teach me a lesson, sometimes about life, sometimes about men, most times about me and my long list of issues (lol)!! It is all good, cause trust, I will love the Queen. I will be victorious in following God, loving me, loving you, and getting rid of fools and living successfully and fully as a grown and blessed woman. K?
On occassion that demon desperation raises her ugly little head. That demon fear is her mother, really. When I took the issue to the Father, he stamped it out. Told me the monster was dead, and to keep dancing to the tune that He placed in my head. He does have the man for me, and I need to continue to take care of me and my life, He has the love part on lock.
So I walk in the fog, dance in it, cry in it knowing that I am being guided through it, and that there will be times of beautiful sunshine. Keep smiling anyway. Favor is my best friends and falls fresh on me like morning dew, every day. Ya' better know it. I will continue to take care of my home, my finances, my education, my health, my life (social and otherwise), my spirit and soul. I will continue to be comfortable being me in my skin and I will remember that I am here to love and be loved and that I am enough where I am. If that is not enough for the men that I meet until I meet the man that I am meant for, let them dance and float on. I am enough. Not too much, not to little, enough. I am a work in progress. If you can't get with that, you can move forward too.
My goal in relationships is not to change or improve a soul. Nor do I need that from anyone I have a relationship with me. I can encourage you to grow, to look at life differently, to relax, and heck yeah to laugh. Encourage me to do the same, esp. the laughing part. Laughter is great for the soul anyway ;o)
It is a new day today. Glad to see it and be a part of it. Thank God I am off of that throne and out of the nitwit pool. Common sense reigns again.
PS - Do not get it twisted. I am still the Queen, but even Royalty must answer to a Higher power.
Kita
posted by Enigma | 8:24 AM
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