Treating Me/ Learning

I am going to the gym. I have a trainer, her name is Robin and it is obviously Robin's job to kill me with exercise. She says I will love her later. Yeah. Right. Probably. Right now I wonder if I am insane for going back to the gym. I am going to go back, so currently yes, this is madness. Oh well, I am use to being a bit mad, what's new? Also the idea of being in shape, looking great, attracting guys and being my naughty, smart mouthed, sassy, classy, fun loving self like I KNOW I can be is a wonderful idea. I got a lot to lose, and honestly it is kinda scary but really fun at the same time to imagine what risks I will take, and I know it will be MORE than what I take now is like... whooooaa. I am a risk taking full figured woman, believe it. That is a bit scary.

However, I know that in realityI am treating me well. I love being treated and feeling special so to the gym I will go. I will defeat diabetes and get off of these dang meds. I will be fine, and sweet, and sassy and classy and daring and risk taking cause, hell... I do it now so I will simply do more of that stuff. Sweet. I like the idea of living my life more fully. This is truly treating me with love and kindness.

I am in school. Both of my teachers seem to be nice. Hmmm. I know that they are going to give me assignments that will kick my butt but make me a better legal researcher and to get ready for the para work force. Good. However this means less sleep, less free time, less kick it with my girls times, less get to have a relationship time. Hmmm. I must be crazy, look at what I will lose, right?

However, I know that this going to school thing with the 3 million assignments is really taking care of, treating me. In the end I will have a good job, a good life, and I will be able to travel. This will mean taking a risk, and though I like taking a risk, this means stepping into a small firm. I am scared, but hey, I gotta take this risk in my life for myself. I am tired of driving downtown to the ATL. Heck, I may meet my future hubby as I go back and forth to work. So you know the gym and school goal thing kinda ties together. I will meet new people and look physically good when I do so. Plus plus.

Yeah. I am treating myself with love, kindess and genuine care.

I am signing myself up to join this massage joint. You join as a member and pay half the price to get massaged, relaxed and spoiled. Yeah! I will be there once monthly, no doubt. I am loving this gentle, kind, caring, loving me genuinely thing. I am getting my hair done as well. Look out Sept. 1. My poor hair. Oh well. It is going to come out the pocket but again, I am learning to treat myself with honor, care, kindness, and genuine authentic love. This treating myself and looking out for myself, caring for myself, genuinely loving myself thing is great.

I am going to get up and take my butt to church at 7:30 am. Lord. I know, I know. Ain't you gone be tired ask my ol' complacent self. Probably, but luckily I can go right back to sleep. For sho'. Then I can get up and relax in front of the TV for a while, go visit fam, prepare my weekly schedule. Have a relaxing day.

My soul and spirit will be lifted by other believers when I go to church. God is always with me, so the feeling and love I always feel from Him will be intensified.

I am learning to live and genuinely authentically love myself, honor myself, take care of myself. I thank God for this walk that I am taking. When the road diverged from others I moved forward with my hand securely in His.