Too Much ...Wat? - RANT
Hey I lied. You can always go to another blog, but I would like it if you stayed a while.
This is to the folks who over the years have told me that I am too much, too me, too spunky, too sassy. I am who I am. This is to the folks who assumed that I am quiet and do not have much to say, want me to be like their mama, and have other ridiculous expectations. I am who I am and I am a balanced combination of all of those things. To those who saw only one side and thought that they could place me firmly in one box or another, you can't. I decide where I sit, you get the right to watch as I choose. Yeah I am a womanist and full- figured. Yeah I can be very sexual, yeah I can be rather aggravative, yeah I can be aggressive, or rather passive depending upon how I view the importance of the situation. Again I am who I am, a balanced combo of all of those things that create moi. I am a womanist, and a writer, a thinker, an optimist and a believer. Yes, I am an enigma. I will not be solved in 30 min or 2 hours. If you need those type of folks in your life, move on. I am not one.
By the by, I do not know any one or two dimensional easily figured out people. If you know one be very afraid. They might one day crave excitement and (cue the Psycho music) there you go. I do not know any chameleon folk either, unless of course you are talking about in a sci-fi way (love it!), so please think on that. I do not fit into your box. I am a black Southern womanist. My face says sweet, confident, kind and so does my mouth until I open it (at times, lol) and voice how I really feel. To those who think I belong in the box you created, I would say bite me, but really just move along. Don't stay. I will not miss you. Well, I will, but not your many expectations. *sigh*
Me too much ... no shawt. I am simply a black woman who did try to live in the box others created and broke out of that box (dang weight gain!). I need to be who I need to be for God and me. If you are not use to this type of thinking, or a person who will say what she thinks when she speaks on how she views her world leave me alone. Stage left.
To the past me who listened to these fools who would not know how to deal with a good, opinionated, loving, caring exponentially gifted and blessed young woman, oh you know. Giiirrrlll, you were a bad one. People remember your face and name to this day and you have not worked at the old bookstore for 12 years. You were not meant for everyone to enjoy and to get to know. Your sweetness got you in trouble with fools and your sass and spunk told/reminded them how much trouble you could be. That doing what I got to without fear or censure thing and choosing your battles are great lessons from the folks. Good going. To the present me, just keeping being you... but more if at all possible ;o) Live as fearlessly as you can.
See I do get it now ya'll. I ain't meant for everybody to get to know and to understand. That is way to many mugs in my life anyway, and I like to keep my life private and mine with good folks along for the journey. I have run into quite a few people lately who were not feeling my style when I was younger, and they meet me now and say stupid things like, have you calmed the heck down. No fool ( I do not actually say this part). I am just more like a scapel than a serated knife, that is what I say now. They lookat me smirk, shake their heads and I, well I stand there waiting for an appropriate response. It never comes. Oh well. Let me lay it to you straight, I decide when I need to or what I need to change. You can suggest, you can encourage, I choose. Being my friend, or any grown folks friend means understanding that. You can take your opinions and chuck them in the river with the rest of the chum. As a person pointed out to me a while, a gift is only gift if it received as one. Trash can. It is a good thing to keep close by. Keep your drivel. I am moving on. Really.
Just enough for being who and what I need to be. Moving on. Smooches and love dahling,
Kita
This is to the folks who over the years have told me that I am too much, too me, too spunky, too sassy. I am who I am. This is to the folks who assumed that I am quiet and do not have much to say, want me to be like their mama, and have other ridiculous expectations. I am who I am and I am a balanced combination of all of those things. To those who saw only one side and thought that they could place me firmly in one box or another, you can't. I decide where I sit, you get the right to watch as I choose. Yeah I am a womanist and full- figured. Yeah I can be very sexual, yeah I can be rather aggravative, yeah I can be aggressive, or rather passive depending upon how I view the importance of the situation. Again I am who I am, a balanced combo of all of those things that create moi. I am a womanist, and a writer, a thinker, an optimist and a believer. Yes, I am an enigma. I will not be solved in 30 min or 2 hours. If you need those type of folks in your life, move on. I am not one.
By the by, I do not know any one or two dimensional easily figured out people. If you know one be very afraid. They might one day crave excitement and (cue the Psycho music) there you go. I do not know any chameleon folk either, unless of course you are talking about in a sci-fi way (love it!), so please think on that. I do not fit into your box. I am a black Southern womanist. My face says sweet, confident, kind and so does my mouth until I open it (at times, lol) and voice how I really feel. To those who think I belong in the box you created, I would say bite me, but really just move along. Don't stay. I will not miss you. Well, I will, but not your many expectations. *sigh*
Me too much ... no shawt. I am simply a black woman who did try to live in the box others created and broke out of that box (dang weight gain!). I need to be who I need to be for God and me. If you are not use to this type of thinking, or a person who will say what she thinks when she speaks on how she views her world leave me alone. Stage left.
To the past me who listened to these fools who would not know how to deal with a good, opinionated, loving, caring exponentially gifted and blessed young woman, oh you know. Giiirrrlll, you were a bad one. People remember your face and name to this day and you have not worked at the old bookstore for 12 years. You were not meant for everyone to enjoy and to get to know. Your sweetness got you in trouble with fools and your sass and spunk told/reminded them how much trouble you could be. That doing what I got to without fear or censure thing and choosing your battles are great lessons from the folks. Good going. To the present me, just keeping being you... but more if at all possible ;o) Live as fearlessly as you can.
See I do get it now ya'll. I ain't meant for everybody to get to know and to understand. That is way to many mugs in my life anyway, and I like to keep my life private and mine with good folks along for the journey. I have run into quite a few people lately who were not feeling my style when I was younger, and they meet me now and say stupid things like, have you calmed the heck down. No fool ( I do not actually say this part). I am just more like a scapel than a serated knife, that is what I say now. They lookat me smirk, shake their heads and I, well I stand there waiting for an appropriate response. It never comes. Oh well. Let me lay it to you straight, I decide when I need to or what I need to change. You can suggest, you can encourage, I choose. Being my friend, or any grown folks friend means understanding that. You can take your opinions and chuck them in the river with the rest of the chum. As a person pointed out to me a while, a gift is only gift if it received as one. Trash can. It is a good thing to keep close by. Keep your drivel. I am moving on. Really.
Just enough for being who and what I need to be. Moving on. Smooches and love dahling,
Kita
posted by Enigma | 11:20 AM
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